#i think i almost had a heartattack when I realized what i had been eating

[mooneln0ne]

hey has anything happened to you lately

i've been eating seafood for the past few days and I just heard about an oil spill near my area that happened yesterday or so

[theressomethinghappeninginparis]

So, it happens that I am correct. Like, after my third cereal bar I realized I'm all alone in here and need to get going. I'd love some water to refill my bottle, and splash my face in case some new alien thing pops up. It got better though. Plants I heard, plants it is!

Transcript of the first and second page: I entered the Biodome. Or at least part of it, since this is a kind of lobby to it. I took photos with my instant camera to capture the richness of the colors I saw. The view into this room was simply astonishing, like a secret hideout of nature. There were butterflies and other insects everywhere! The freshwater fountain in the middle had three gargoyle heads, one of which was pushed down. I suspect there has been someone here before me. There was also a moved wallbehind the stairs I came through, and the gargoyle head could have been a lever of some sort.

Transcript of the third and fourth page: This cross shaped fucker almost killed me! I got a scratch from it trying to snack me. Stay away! I promise this thing is sentient that blood is pumping through my veins. Cheesus, what a heartattack. Then I came across this plant and hurried up. It was breathing something greenish out, I left the place hurriedly afterwards. It smelled aweful too, I hope I won't get any side effects from this. How do I explain this to a real doctor on the surface?

Transcript of the fifth and sixth page: That was the only thing not trying to eat or hurt me, I think. It was an orchid my size, the most normal thing in here. It scented beautifully, yet I'm not sure how it related to the other plants besides it being enormous. These brown pods were stinking so much I took a photo a few metres away. Again, everything in there is either deadly or looked so suspicious I stayed away or literally snapped me so I left the room after gazing at the plants. Enough vegetables for now.

Transcript of the eighth and nineth page: The jokes write themselves! This is not enough vegetables, at least I don't know it these things are...plants or not. The next room as seen from the stairs are filled with glass vials in a row with animals/plants/whatever in there. Not all were filled though, but something was in the ones...that were broken. I kid you not. I got a few steps closer and these things look like insects or something? I want to note that nothing moved in there, they were just swimming in a liquid or jelly, I'm not sure.

Transcript of the tenth and eleventh page: When I got even closer these things looked like shrimps? Yeah I'm just thankful they stayed in their pods and didn't break out like SOME POD DID. All of the vials were either filled with green liquid or only the glass was green, but thinkng about it I don't care too much. I'm leaving.

Transcript of the twelfth page: Here's the one open pod and my problem. So, what the fuck was in here? Where is it? And where does this lead to? As if I'm going to find that out. NOPE. Yeah, no.

I'm having enough of this crap, I'll continue cursing. Where's the door outside?

Transcript of the thirteenth page:

Here comes my problem. Number two. There is no door outside.

Yeah I am angry and aggressive and I don't know what to do or how to proceed. The door I came through is a dead end. There is not a single open door here, the electricity is still down, and I'm never ever going down the tun in which something- or someone- was in already. What do I do now?

How desperate am I?

Can't go back. I need answers. And to move on.

There's water down the glass pods and that's all I see.

If this is acid, I'll die.

In conclusion: a lot. I'm in lots of desperation.

I threw some of my sandwhich in there. It just floated and swam up and stayed the same even after ten minutes, just dissolved into flakes a bit. Acid would have corroded it, right? So I think I'm completely idiotic, but I'll put this book in my sandwhich's water proof ziploc and- swim.

Hopefully.

[stxrmylxve]

Welcome to eternity.

NOTICE: I was going to make this a series, but honestly i’ve been pondering this for days and have no idea where to go from here lol. Just think of this as like angst to admiration with the haitani brothers??

summed up: once they find you, you’ll never leave.

notes:

drugs/pills

cussing

fem!reader

fighting

kidnapping? (sorta)

suggestive content if you squint really hard (ran)

some pet names

enjoy??!

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You rubbed your eyes, the lack of sleep getting to you as you pulled out the keys to your apartment. You did, however, catch the white envelope sitting on the floor in front of your door after you had closed the door. You leaned down and picked it up, wondering why they hadn’t just put it in your box instead of walking it up four flights of stairs to put it here.

You threw your keys in the bowl and took your shoes off, pulling up your hair and ripping open the envelope. Inside were pictures of.. you. You at the store last week, you singing in the kitchen (embarrassing), you in you bedroom. This almost gave you a heartattack, how long had they been watching you?

You tore the photos up and threw them in the trash, scared to even have something like that near you. You sighed to yourself and went to take a shower, hoping this was all a dream and you would wake up with some warmth in your system.

It however wasn’t, as much as it pained you to know. You wouldn’t wake up. And you would never have the same life again.

When you got out of the shower, you dried off, put on a shirt and shorts, and started on your hair. After detangling it, you returned to your bedroom to (hopefully) get a good night’s rest and just eat in the morning instead of tonight as you were worn out from the events of the day.

You put your things up in the closet and turned around to find two young men sitting on your bed, both having purple accents to their hair. You figured they were either the ones or affiliated with the ones that had been watching you, so you calmly closed the door and fully walked into the room.

“Nice baton. What is that, your pet beside you?" you note as the shorter of the two stiffens, must have struck a nerve with that remark.

"I'm not a pet. I'm his brother." he says with a scowl

"You do realize that telling personal information like that is bad if you're coming to do a crime, right?" you say as you walk to your dresser to find a sweatshirt to put on.

"Why are you so calm, sweetheart? I have a baton, he has excellent fighting skills, and you're more worried on putting on a sweatshirt?" the taller asks as you slip the hoodie over your head.

"Well yeah, I don't want to freeze when you take me elsewhere." you deadpan as you turn around again and pick some sweatpants from the bottom drawer.

"Damn, she does have a nice ass though.

"Shut up Ran."

"But Rindou, look-"

"Rindou and Ran.. what, did they get lazy and just like the letter R?" you say with a chuckle as you put the pants on over your shorts, tying the drawstring as you turn around again.

"And I know I have a mighty fine ass, thank you. But I didn't give you the freeway ticket to look at it." you say as you put your arms out with a sigh as you looked at the boys.

"Uh.. what?" Rindou asks as he looks as Ran and then back at you.

"Well? Take me to neverland, you have photos of me, what else? Take me out of here." you say as you lower your arms as you realize they weren't smart enough to bring handcuffs.

"Dude, did mikey really think she was going to fight back? Look at this sweetheart! Wonder if I can have her instead of him?" Ran says with a smile as Rindou glares at him.

"If you want the rest of Bonten on you, sure, take her for yourself. Idiot." he says with a sigh.

"Bonten? Y'all are with them?" you ask, your voice a little more shakey that what you would have liked.

"Stop spilling info Rindou!" Ran blurts as Rindou turns to him offended.

"Me? You said my name!" he yells back.

"Well you said mine, but not she knows who we're with you dumbass!"

"She knows our name, so what? She could make the connection herself, l'm sure she did!"

Through all of this yelling, you had slipped out of the window in the living room and was now on a ledge on the side of the building, clinging onto it for dear life.

"This wasn't smart. Maybe I should just let them sort it out and go with them and die there rather than painfully like this." you say to yourself as you scoot across, hoping your neighbors would be home to let your into their room to get out of the wind that was about to knock you off.

Of course they weren’t, leaving you no choice but to go back and head to your room for safety. You finally got back to the window and crawled back inside, meeting face to face with a confused Rindou and a slightly angered Ran.

“Where did yoh think you were going?” Ran asks as he throws you over his shoulder like you weighed nothing to him.

“Hey! I didn’t want to listen to you two yell! Hey, put me down- mmhp” you fight as Rindou covers your mouth from behind Ran as you all walk out of the door together.

You slap his hand down with a scowl and beat on Ran’s back.

“Atleast say where we’re going.” you finally say as you had tired yoursef out from hitting his muscular back built like a brick.

“To the HQ.” he says with a slap of your ass and a smile, making you yelp and hit the back of his head.   

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡

When you arrived there, you were expecting a much more… evil looking place. This was just a huge mansion that looked more like a house than something affiliated with a famous gang.

Ran sets you down and fixes his suit, dusting it off as he allows Rindou to go first and puts you in the middle as he follows in last.

Inside was even bigger; chandeliers the size of lions, beautiful marble floors, nothing that you could ever have the money to afford.

“Like it? You’ll be seeing it everyday.” Ran says with a smile as you huff and take your hand down from caressing the walls of the mansion.

“Why do you even want me? I couldn’t ever be in this price range, plus I am not even interesting compared to the things I’m sure you’ve seen!” you yell as you stomp your foot like a child.

“She sure is a yeller.” a man with a long scar across his face says as a pink haired man trailed beside him with a large grin.

“Perfect for me.”

“Sanzu, you’re high again, don’t go shoving fucking pills down her throat when she just got here.” Rindou says with a frown as Sanzu’s smile drops.

“You guys don’t ever let me look at anyone man.” he says with a sigh as he examines you from afar, eyes raking your body up and down and settling on your face after a while.

“She’ll do nice, don’t’chu think Ran?” Sanzu says with a grin as he takes out a pill bottle and pops a pill in his mouth, grinning with his head back and walks away with a giggle.

“Don’t worry about him, he is just high right now on our new shipment. He likes stuff like that so he is like the.. experimenter, you know?” Rindou says with a soft smile as you stepped forward, not realizing you had sunk back into him when you were a little terrified of the encounter with Sanzu.

"Oh.. that's normal here?" you ask as you smooth your hair out with your hand, turning to the new man with a scar again.

"What?" he asks.

"That scar," you ask as you walk up and run your hand on it, "does it hurt?"

"Not anymore." he says as he removes your hand gently, turning away to hide a slight blush that had creeped up on his face.

"Oh.. good!" you chirped as you smiled and wandered towards the kitchen, hungry as you had not eaten in hours.

"She already acts like she owns the place." Ran says with a chuckle as he jogs after you.

—————————————————————————

[universal-kitty]

.: NatsuShio: The OC/Canon Ship That Ruined My Life :.

(In the Best Way)

@supernatural-cat98, get buckled in.

   Let’s start with how I started. An Okami OC.

   Her name is Shiori, but her full name is Shiorigami, a brush kami OC for the game Okami. Once an adoptable from DeviantArt, I made her into a fully-fleshed out character fit for the game. Sure, she’s an usual hybrid (nekotori; cat body, but with tail feathers like a small peacock), but she’s the kami of Poems and Literature. She’s got social anxiety and a thinly veiled reference to autism, as she is stunted to everyone, including her extensive family...but writing is where she blooms.

   Fiction, biographies, history, poems of all kinds... If it’s writing, she’s happy. It protects her and makes her happy, even when she fears she isn’t a good enough brush kami. Even if her powers are an inky echo of her mother’s.

   She once had short hair. She once loved a Lunarian named Kazuki... A scholar of the Moon Tribe, during a period of tension and war between his people and the Celestials... Shiori’s people. Despite it all, they truly did love each other, despite never admitting it out loud. He was gifted a scroll of poems he inspired her to write. He gave her a golden necklace- almost collar-like- with the symbol of the Moon Tribe engraved on the back.

   ...He would end up dying in a slaughter done by the evil the Moon Tribe had summoned. Those who fled to the mortal world to escape the war becoming the only survivors. Kazuki was gone...and left Shiori not only with a deep depression, but also with a fear to care for anyone who was mortal.

   Who could die and be ripped from her grasp, just like Kazuki had.

   Her hair grew out over the years (faceclaim: Suiren Shibazeki from Hibi Chouchou), protected by her mother to ease her pain of the death of the one she loved most...and in the years after the events of Okami, would stay either in her room on the Celestial Plain or occasionally live on the mortal world, in a small house to herself among a forest not too far from Ryoshima Coast.

   And so. It would be this starting point for a fateful meeting...

   Natsu Dragneel. Specifically, burningheartdragneel, my roleplay partner. (To my Shio, @goddessof-poems.) He met Amaterasu first, having somehow...gotten himself a little universe-lost. Befriending her was easy; both liking to fight, both loving to eat... It was easy for them.

   Yet he poses an interesting challenge for sweet, quiet Shiori. Little bookworm, easily forgets to eat at all, and isn’t much one for the adventuring scene, like her mother or Natsu.

   ...However, it’s because of her Natsu learns the joys of reading; specifically, an adventurous story of fiction Shiori had written some time before. He makes a small, but decent meal for the forgetful Shiori, ensuring she eats...and even motivates her to get out of her home, taking him to show off Ryoshima Coast and her own Water Tablet that Amaterasu gifted her.

   It’s our current roleplay and a still on-going one, but we came up with so much more as we talked over Discord. They will slow burn their way, but us? We know how the path goes....and we ended up falling in love with a pairing of our own creation.

ExoticGeneral: Ah gods I love this! Especially since Shiori isn't the kind to stop her work to eat or anything Natsu would at some point bring snacks with him and probably feed her (and he hardly likes sharing either) because somebodies is gonna have to be watching over her. But if he woke up with her all beside him, he'd be pretty flustered about it. Plus as an added bonus he always oddly warm, which makes for good cuddling in the winter/chilly days. :3c Yeah, he'd probably be more careful with her because even if she is a brush good she's just so fragile. He'd probably bond with her relatively easy though since he's always been a cat kinda guy? But yeah, demon hunting would be a big no-no while she was around. No need to try and scare her away. But I thought about that heat headcanon thing would be funny cause I can't see either making the first move ever! xD

Aki: Oh gosh, yeah. Shiori's the type for "skinny love" situations, where it's almost painfully obvious she loves the person, but if nobody acts on it, then it's this firm stalemate. Tbh, she'd likely only "confess" if he got really hurt and she was scared for him....but even then, it's confusing for the oblivious bc-?? Was that a confession? What if it wasn't????

ExoticGeneral: But god a confession like that would be hilarious cause it might just go over his head! He'd probably just grin like an idiot, being all like 'Thanks that means a lot' and playing it off as completely platonic possibly. He may be bold in everything else, but love is something he's actually insecure about considering his first girlfriend died, his mom, like three of his dads and his brother wants to murder him.

Aki: Ommmmggggg. She'd probably laugh a little and keep trying to tell herself it's better this way, bc like...... (And this is what kills me) She'd rather have a friend in him than nothing at all bc of rejection so she'd start spiraling down and try to keep upbeat even though she keeps thinking about it and getting guilty bc what if he only wants them to be friends???? What if he didn't like romance at all?? She doesn't want to push him away from her..... She'd rather suffer years of not having him love her back then lose him. (And re-reading this..... Ouch on the death of the first girlfriend. Shiori knows that pain.... Except slightly more painful that she also never confessed to the guy and lost him to the slaughter of the Moon Tribe.)

ExoticGeneral: AKI DONT They'd both end up suffering because they're shy potatoes who can't convey their feelings properly for the life of them! It wouldn't even get better cause she'd only start going down hill after a while and he'd more than likely notice but not realize he's the problem in a way and FUUUUUUCCCKKKK

Aki: HAHAHAHAHAA, YOU'RE TOO LATE; MY POWERS HAVE BEEN REALIZED She'd actually manage pretty well for awhile, being oblivious, but then the feelings would start and that very emotion would be her downfall. Because then what are you supposed to do when you want to hug your "friend" for no apparent reason and just...stay there? That you wouldn't mind if he stayed over all the time and got to sleep with him, because that's when the nightmares kept away from her? (And even if they did show up, he was there to comfort her...) She's an absolutely wreck after awhile and keeps spacing out and begins to screw up and she's like a black hole collapsing in on itself and it hurts so bad to watch

ExoticGeneral: STAHP YOURE HURTING MY SHIPPER HEART BEFORE THE SHIP ACTUALLY EXISTS That blackhole though, like how do you even fix that??? Because the closer you get to her the more it's probably hurting her and you could confess but getting closer is what caused it to progress. HOW DO YOU PROTECT YOUR SHIT WHEN YOU'RE THE PROBLEM!?!? Your making me emotional and it's only like 8 in the morning, I don't want to start my day sad already!

Aki: Shiori finally breaking down in front of Natsu though. Like, it was a little trip over a tree root or something and she says, "O-oh, n-no, I'm fine...." But Natsu's just-??? No you're not, you're crying. Why are you crying? What hurts?? And from there she starts bawling and Natsu is awkward but tries his best. He also has little to no idea what she's saying pass those sobs of hers, but oUCH PAIN EVERYWHERE. Then- awhoop- right out of that sobbing mess comes a pretty clear confession, whoo boy--

ExoticGeneral: But HOLY SHIT when a confession happens he'd get flustered. To the point of constant figgeting and just a permanent blush would cover his face. He'd probably end up staying silent, then just start crying and fuck me up. The first confession of his life??? hE WAS NOT READY FOR THIS BUT IS TOTALLY ACCEPTING OF THIS! She'd get to see an entirely new spectrum of him though when he gets all soft-hearted and actually reveals his romantic side???

Aki: Shiori's equally as flustered and waiting to please just collapse in on herself and cease existance....and then once she realized she didn't fuck things up, she's crying with him and so much affection????? Oh no, the cutes. Cutes everywhere. Also Shiori is a huge sap and she's going to love that. But now he has to deal with his cute new goddess gf blushing whenever he smooches even just her cheek. Or holds her hand. Or snuggles up to her..... When he breathes LMAO, Jk...~

ExoticGeneral: THem crying together. THat thought just gives me life cause they're just two mushy emotional destroyed people atm. Just I don't even know who would actually recover first at that point, maybe Natsu, and just give her the longest most affectionate hug he's got in him. This relationship ain't gonna last long, give it like a week and he'll probably die from a cute overload. He'd try to pamper her a bit (though he wouldn't know how really) and just take her out to star gaze and do some silly things. But holding hands??? Like that's really lewd ya know.

Aki: Yeeeaaaahhh, he probably would. Shiori's trying to calm down, but those silly tears won't stop~ But she'll still snuggle close when he hugs her and hug him back. AH. AAAAAAHHHHHH. Natsu coming back to her place after that little event and suddenly, her new greeting is, "Welcome home," with a bright smile. Natsu kneels tf over bc cHRIST DID HE JUST HAVE A HEARTATTACK?!?!?!??

   Oh yes. We had a LENGTHY talk about their confession... But is that all? Of course not!! We’ve also had conversations about...

   Sleeping habits:

Aki: Oh man, and if she woke up to that racing heart of his.... All sleepy and concerned and it's right out of a romance novel and someone help Natsu bc death is rapidly approaching

ExoticGeneral: And the thing is that's one of his quirks. Like his way of saying 'I think I like you' IS sleeping at there house a lot more often. TO the point where it's just an everyday exerpeince and it's only weird if he DOESN'T show up one night.

Aki: !!!! Natsu being late one night and he's surprised bc it's late as fuck but there's Shiori, obviously tired and ready for bed, but unable to sleep because she'd gotten used to sleeping with Natsu and his warmth. (He has to pull confidence and fake cheer before he's allowed to start dying in the darkness of her room; that was so fuckin' cute and she was holding onto that little cat plush and she looked so lonely jfc whAT THE FUCK that level of cute is illegal in all the states and all of the worlds and timelines, bYE)

ExoticGeneral: But I can totally see that! He just kinda pushes open her door and it's like 2 in the fucking morning. The conflicted feelings he must have though knowing that when he walks in there he's gonna suffer for a few hours or more but is like 'fuck ing worth it.'  (She needs to tone it down because if the guy who lives to fight wants to SNUGGLE then there's a problem. No one man, goddess or not, should be allowed to have so much power!)

Aki: She's just more than happy to see him bc dang it, she couldn't sleep without him...and the second she's comfy and curled up against him? Boop. Out like a light. (Plot twist: her real power is being cute as hell. Her cuteness so strong, who needs weaponry?? Flutter those lashes, tilt her head... If she has the ears and feather tails out? B y e. You're dead now. Sorry, don't make the rules.)

ExoticGeneral: JEEz THOUGH! Not being able to sleep without him! Now all of a sudden he becomes like a necessity for a proper nights sleep, or any at all really. (But that's one way to competely get to him. Sexy? Pfffft, he can ignore that most of the time. Cute, fucking slay him okay? Just 'Here lies Natsu, rest in pieces' and fuck she's a cutie!)

Aki: I mean.... He could be a mean little one and let her pass out once it becomes too much, but there's also the huge implication that Natsu actually sorta gets her on a sleep schedule?? Something she usually doesn't have at all???? When Natsu's getting snuggled up in the futon, it basically becomes a sign of, "Oh, time to stop for today and sleep." Reverse alarm clock, Natsu is. Getting a certain poetry goddess to bed rather than waking her up (or keeping her up, as is). (Shiori perfected the cute ability. Cute traits that'd be passed down for generations. Flirting-but-not-flirting, the ultimate technique. How will poor Natsu ever survive?!?)

   Dinners with Mom Amaterasu:

Aki: Meet the parents? More like, "Forget that formal stuff! Let's go out and eat dessert before dinner!!!!" Because Ammy doesn't really do formal anymore and why not just....use the time for the better?? Like eating???? Not to mention, then she can embarrass the two like, "Now you gotta feed each other. Do it, do it, do it~!!" Ammy is a gr8 mom, as you can tell

ExoticGeneral: Well I don't think it could happen. I think Ammy and natsu met because he tried pelting her with water ballons. There is no need to be formal after that! But I can see Ammy rigging everything somehow. Just like ordering milkshakes for all three but 'accidentally' forgets one so she gets a whole one while Natsu and shiori share. with coincidentally two staws.

Aki: "Hmmmm, would you look at that.... Strange." Casually drinks at her own like NBD--  And that's true!!! No formality exists here; there's only the two dorks and the shy poet, who's more than happy to be the little side-line cheerleader for their antics. (Unless they're questionable. Then she's worried and trying to get them off of the idea. Probably crit. hits Natsu by being cute.)

  The time I almost wrote in our RP that Shiori was gonna kiss his cheek....and they’re not even CLOSE to dating, oh boy:

Aki: .....It suddenly occurs to me that I want an aesthetic made of NatsuShio.............

ExoticGeneral: I'm laughing. This isn't a pairing (Yet) and you're like grabby hands

Aki: Hey. Hey. Compare this to the time I almost wrote in Shio kissing Natsu's cheek waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyy too early, and a little aesthetic ain't that bad~

ExoticGeneral: You know if you had wrote that slip up I would have went along with it too. It would have been a hilarious mess.

Aki: LMAO. Even Shiori would be confused like, "......I have never before in my LIFE ever done that.... Why did I do that now?!?" This is the Sims and I am the tru god and their lives are my pLAYTHINGS

ExoticGeneral: He would have stopped everything for a solid 5 minutes then continue like it didn't happen. If you don't react it's like it never happened, right? I mean that's how we do it anyways. We make them suffer cause it's fun

Aki: Plot twist, though...... Isn't even freezing considered a reaction?! So by freezing he thinks he didn't react, but the act of freezing up is a reaction in itself......!! YOU'VE BEEN PLAYED, NATSU!!! They aren't suffering yet, buuuuut..... All in due time

   Memes, of course:

ExoticGeneral: Ammy: So do you and Shio call each other pet names? Natsu: Pfffft! No! Of course not! Ammy: What do bees make then? Natsu:....Honey? Shio, from the other room: Yeah, sweetie? Ammy: Don't you ever lie to my face again.

Aki: tHIS WOULD HAPPEN, F U CK-- I AM LOSING IT

   And the moment we acknowledged how we know this ship was The One; our OTP forever and always: (featuring the best rant I’ve ever written for this ship)

ExoticGeneral: It's literally freaking insane how you just start having ten billions of ideas running through you're head! Like okay time to put then through some angst hell, then recovery fluff, little slice of life, smooches and some bonding/ development??? Like Im getting way too far ahead of myself here??? But the ideas/drabbles keep on rolling anyway. This is how you know this is the one.

Aki: Yes!!! And like.... Honestly, I pride myself on doing "realistic" stuff? Having my characters contradict themselves sometimes, do something that would hurt....cause humans are like that. Hell, it's why I also brazenly went for Shiori's emotional breakdown when she heard the news that all Lunarians had died..... Including her dear Kazuki.  Being able to imagine and know how that breakdown went in my head, where nothing she tried worked, until she went crawling back to her mother to grant her wish to not exist...take the pain away......  Boi. B o i. When it comes to big time storywriting, I get hELLA AMPED. I'm ready to show them every corner of the world, good or bad. Perfection or deep flaws. Give me that angst where they will realize that it hurts, but having someone to hurt with makes the pain ease a little. It doesn't fix everything, but having those assuring words and someone who cares deeply makes it harder to be upset. Let them have those slice of life days where Shiori wakes up in bed for once, stomach not aching or feeling like a void, and ready to start a new day. Have him drag her out to explore and shake up her old, rigid life. Let them, in the future, kiss and hug and wonder why....but know that if waiting so long meant finding love and getting it this right, then it was worth the wait. Let them develop so much, that we look back to where we started and cackle with joy, cause they friggen made it. Wow, a sappy rant from me, yEEHAW

ExoticGeneral: Damn right sister! Preach it! Like sometimes I just sit there with some bsckground music on and its so fitting that you just throw out 20 paragraphs like no problem. I just need those days with them where they argue over something little and it gets so blown out of proprtion and convoluted that they just forget what is was about? Just random nights of stargazing then falling asleep? Or literally doing nothing and either of them thinks of their s/o and gets super flustered for no reason? The day they actually become a couple but still trains his tush off and shio doesnt ask how he got strong, but why he did cause heckie is that gonna be one wild ride of a story. But the simple, final answer is to  protect her. Not because she's the daughter of Ammy, but because he failed to do so with his dad and elder brother and doesn't want to lose her too. Like I want weakness that comes with trust? Fear that comes with love? But also the fulfilling satisfaction of contentness. That you wouldn't trade this for anything else, its a unique feeling that only they can deliver. Ya feel?

Aki: Right??? Good heavens, mention music and now I need to go look up Shio's number one mood music........ Can't think Shio romance (especially where it's "skinny love") without remembering the song, sO-- Right?? Well, more likely her trying to fight back but she angry cries and just gets frustrated and shuts down. Won't talk. Won't feed the flames anymore with replies, but doesn't seek peace, either. It's a night where it alternates between dead silence in the home once more or quiet, strained sobs of someone who's already used to being hurt; she's just finding it harder to keep that pain quiet.    But it's..... It's home. More than it's ever been. From a family she couldn't quite connect with some days, to her own home all to herself... A place her own and where her life fit.    Last thing she would've ever expected is to find- in many ways- her opposite....and yet someone she'd find herself falling for all the same. Where it's funny to imagine her home used to be quiet and peaceful. Now there's some training dummies outside and even if he strays from home, she can hear him making noises out not too far away. There's footsteps of another person in her home now. This home....it's his home, too.    Something they're both happy to have. Company, understanding, and just.... An imbalance that makes it a balance by not being perfect.    She slows him down. He speeds her up.    They learn something from each other.    It hurts sometimes. His life will likely be long....but to what length? Will it end? Does she want to know? Should she ask?    And understanding what her mother saw in mortals from that.... Just because they cannot match in eternal age, doesn't make it all any less. The memories shared? Still memories made. Love was still had and wasn't it sweet? To love someone so completely, to have fought and made up, loved and lost...    It's scarier when it's you who can be hurt; this isn't watching someone's life play out like a movie. This is her life now and his and theirs together and it breaks her heart to know she could potentially lose him, but..... He's going to teach her so much. And she would understand what her mother does.    He'll be loved all the more for it.

ExoticGeneral: I literally have absolutely no words for this. I cant believe you would make me cry like this at midnight. This was the most hurtful, true, heartfelt yet heartbreaking thing I've read. I freaking forgot you did poetry is you spare time like holy.

   ...They just. Work together. It’s the perfect “opposites attract” relationship while still maintaining a balance between who they are alone and what their relationship is. The bolster of inspiration and motivation that they get from each other... He motivates her to leave the house more (often with him on a little adventure) and gives her that experience. As said, she slows him down and gets him to read more. Even try writing for himself, writing Shiori a small poem that he [slams down onto her desk and runs off in a hurry] gives her.

   Broadening their horizons with each other. The support and pure affection and how they do their best in their own ways to support each other... It’s perfect. Made a home in our hearts. And we sure wouldn’t want it any other way.

   As a final note... Have one more silly little meme we came up with:

Aki: So I'm re-reading our chat [again] and I just thought of this...... Natsu: I live to fight, so Imma take you down!!! Shiori, in her sleepy-whiny voice: Natsuuuu...... I wanna cuddle.... Natsu, already leaving: .......Someone else lives to fight and will take you down!!!

ExoticGeneral: You know that old saying goes, he who runs away lives to fight another day I'm glad I'm the only who just goes back and re-reads this entire message board of gross romance and heartbreak

   So yes, ship NatsuShio. Your heart will thank you...after it dies for 2 hours because of the angst that tails this ship in bittersweet flavors.

[peachyjie]

A Cup Of What? || Huang Justin

A/N : writing this whilst drinking coffee, if you are wondering. I got so into it, I kinda forgot I was suppose to post this an hour ago.

Requested : No (ask box is open btw, and my WIP is dry af)

Pairing : Huang Justin - Reader

Genre : fluff + flustered Justin *which is cute*

Summary : A warm cup of coffee can change a lot, especially for a flustered baby.

————•————

Justin hummed in adoration, he stared at you from across of the room. Quanzhe could feel his stare penetrating flowers all over him.

You may not noticed, too engrosed styling Zhengting’s hair that is not so coorperative today.

“Ge, she’s so pretty”, he sighed one more time. Chengcheng stared at the younger, his eyes judging him.

Justin Huang, or Huang MingHao is officially in love with you. Believe it or not, his interest got the best of him the moment one of the senior stylist brought you in, introducing you to everyone as the new girl that’s joining the team.

So officially, Justin had been interested in you for 3 months. At first it was small glances, curious glances.

He would study you a little, taking your features. You’re stil considered young to be considered a professional stylist. But your work speaks otherwise.

You have a passion for fashion and art, and what better way on combining it? That’s right, a stylist.

You always love the feeling of making people feel beautiful, and you always love painting them. You love making transformation, big or small.

And Justin admired you for that. Despite having a big talent, you always shy away and stay humble. Saying your work still needs improvement.

He kept staring at you as you sprayed some hair spray on Zhengting’s hair. Mumbling to yourself how annoying his hair is, not wanting to stay in place.

Chencheng stared at the younger and sighed. “If you like her that much, why don’t you ask her out?”

And boy, Chengcheng had never seen such red face on anyone in his life before.

Justin Huang was blusing.

Hard

Quanzhe just shakes his head and continued reading his book. “Stop it, ge! That’s like you’re asking me to marry your sister!”, Justin replied, hissing at Chengcheng.

Which earns a smack from Chengcheng.

Justin yelped too loud making head turns, making Zhengting’s turn, which made you turn to stare at him.

When he caught your stare, he swore he could explode into millions of stardusts. Why is your eyes so mesmerizing and so beautiful, its killing him.

His daze didn’t last long before Zhengting’s inner Mom came out of him, barking at Chengcheng and Justin. Surprising all of you.

“Be nice!”, Zhengting whipped his head to you and smiled. “Am i done?”, you laughed. Justin swore he thinks he is hearing angels singing.

“Not yet, Ting. Your hair won’t stay in place”, you said proceeding to take a comb and hairspray. “Maybe it’s hungry!”, Zhengting said out of sense.

You laughed harder. “Ting, that doesn’t make any sense.”, making him pout. “But i am hungry”, he sulked. You smiled softly, being around the same age with them got you easier to talk and joke around with them.

“How bout, you go eat and let someone take your place?”, you didn’t have to wait long. Because the moment Zhengting stood up, you saw Justin being thrown by Chengcheng to your station.

You jumped a little, while Justin is still in his daze registering how he teleported. “You came in fast, Minghao”, you smiled at the younger one.

He snaps his gaze to you and laugh awkwardly. You didn’t waste any more time and started your work.

He became all soft noticing how you always call him using his real name instead of his stage name. He once asked why, and you plainly said-

“It’s a nice name, why should you hide it?”

Aside of his favorite time on stage, this was his favorite moment. He always managed to get himself all polished with you, only you. No one else.

You

He felt familiar with your touches, and it put his heart on ease. And this is the only time where he can be so close to you with an important reason.

“You’re getting really popular these days”, you tried starting a converstation with him. He almost jumped when you spoke.

“Y-yea, it’s nerve-wrecking”, you hummed as you applied lip coloring on him.

Which mean you’re being in a really close proximity with him

Which mean Justin had to keep himself from having a nosebleed heartattack by your beauty

“I’m gonna start on your hair now”, Justin didn’t realized he was holding his breath. He took a big breath and huffed away. Nodding vigorously.

You giggled a little. “Any request?”, you ask him. Staring at him from the mirror, you wait.

Justin being a flustered baby, he blurted out without thinking”

“You”

This catched you off guard. You stared at him wide eyed. Justin was a mess, he’s screaming internallyvat how dumb can he get. Figuring out how to fix the situation.

“Hey, Y/N”, you saw Zhengting calling. He held up a cup of coffee. You smiled in gratefulness, finally being able to get a dose of caffeine.

“Thank you, Zhengting”, you said as you walked to his side. Justin was still thinking how to make the conversation less awkward, not noticing you slipping away.

You were about to take the coffee from Zhengting, before the tall guy tripped. Stumbling and grip loosen on the cup

It happened too fast.

You were about to catch the cup, but it was already too late anyways. The cap is open, liquid spilling out.

A gasp came out of your lips, everyone in the room soon panicked.

Justin, Huang Justin. The contestant of Idol Producer who managed to steal all hearts from young to older woman to vote for him. That talented kid who can dance and rap was now done for.

Justin didn’t know what happened.

But

Justin felt like being slapped by liquid, warm liquid. He broke his trance. Justin stared at himself. Horror masking his face.

Then he screams

If there is a top 3 screaming contest in Yuehua, you would gladly nominate Justin. Because right now his scream is between a state of a dying dolphin and a choked crow.

It was a mess, a big mess

Taking responsibility, you grab his hand and drags him to the changing room. Justin was too busy freaking out to notice he is being held by you.

Zhengting whipped his head staring down at the culprit, he glared at Chengcheng. Chengcheng just took his outstretched leg back and stare at his mother. Acting confusion.

“Wopsie?”, Chengcheng fake shrugs, earning a loud smack from Zhengting.

“Not the face, Ge!!! NOT THE FACE!!”

You grabbed a towel and quickly drys Justin, you didn’t mind your work going to waste. It doesn’t matter right now

“Are you hurt?”, you checks every side of his face for any burn. Justin noticing the situation, blushed.

You noticing his red face, grew more worried. “Did you burn yourself?! Oh god, we need to go to get you checked and-“

“No!”, Justin yelled making you cringed. He clears his throat awkwardly. “It’s okay, I’m okay”, he said still trying to recover himself from his blushing state

“Are you sure?”, still unsure. Justin took a deep breath. “Yes, I am sure”, Justin choked.

“I am far than okay, especially after you already helped me dry myself. I am completely okay, the coffee wasn’t even that hot! Hell, its not even as hot as you-“, Justin stared at himself in horror

You wide eyed stared at him back, shocked. “I am so screwed”, Justin cursed himself kneeling, flustered

“Minghao?”, Justin stared at you. “Want to talk about what’s in your mind?”

Justin stared at you, uncertain written in his eyes. “I won’t run, Hao. I promise”, you reassured

“I-“, he choked out before he stops. He sighs, clearing his throat.

“I like you, a lot. And I know it’s been only like 3 months that you came, but I am sincere. I like you a lot, and I realized how dumb I can get until I was a flustered mess. Gosh, you probably won’t date such a dork, I’ll just-“

“Minghao”, you snaps him out of his rambles. You laughed a little. “Relax, you were rapping and it’s not even recorded yet”, you tried to joke.

Justin blushed more, feeling embarrassed. You cleared your throat, gaining his attention again.

“You know, this is such a worst timing for you to confess”, you started.

Justin swore he heard his heart breaks a little. Is this it? Rejection right in spot? Can he run away and never come back? Can he-

“Yea, you’re right”, he said dejected. You smiled.

“No, you dork. I meant, we need to get yourself polished. You’re a mess right now, what would your fans do if you go on stage like this?”, you gestures his state

Justin processing the situation, registering what you meant. He smiled.

“You mean, you’re not rejecting me?!”

“Why would I?”, you opened the door. “Come one, Minghao. After the show, let’s get some coffee and talk about it”, you smiled

Justin all giddy and mushed could only nod. You should know how happy he is. This is the best day of his life. He got his girl.

And all that was sacrificed was a cup of coffee

[uta-no-knb]

hellooooo!!! i saw you open the ask box sooo... i was wondering... may i ask for a fluff where akashi as a vampire... a sadistic one (more like ayato from diabolik lover ahhhh... >_

First off….I”M SO SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING PATIENT!! I will say that I’m not really good with sadistic stuff but I”m going to give it all a try.

I saw diabolik lover, but stopped half-way through because I got bored a bit XD (I think season 2)…but I’m going to start because Tatsuhisa Suzuki is in season 2!

Anyway, I kinda made this….kinda like Diabolik Lovers-where the GoM are all vampire brothers (with the exception of Kise)..so just for shits and giggles, here is who I believe the GoM would be from the Sakamaki family Diabolik Lovers (a brief description, bound to change…Kise is definitely not Kanato, )

Sakamaki Ayato - AkashiSakamaki Laito - Aomine (perverts)Sakamaki Shu - Murasakibara (They’re both lazy)Sakamaki Subaru - KurokoSakamaki Reiji - MidorimaSakamaki Kanato- Kise

I personally find that Akashi is a combination of some of the brothers-but that is a headcanon for a different day-if anyone wants to ask about which diabolik lovers represent characters from KnB, ask away in a separate request (kinda like how I did the Inside Out headcanons.)

ONWARD WITH THE REQUEST (I gave Akashi partially the same personality as Ayato btw…..) I may or may not  be watching Diabolik Lovers as I write this XD

1 pm; Location: Mansion

“Um…..Sei-chan?” you asked as you walked into the kitchen to find your boyfriend currently eating. “What are you doing?”

Akashi looked up, his yellow eyes connecting with your (e/c) ones. “What does it look like I’m doing?” he mumbled, his mouth full of food. “I’m eating, stupid.”

You just arched an eyebrow and sat across from him, resting your head in the palm of your hand. “Takoyaki again? Seriously, what is so great about that stuff?”

“It’s crisp on the outside and soft on the inside which is how I like it.”

“I see…”

“What is on our mind,” he questioned, which surprised you. “Don’t bother lying, (F/N). I know something is bothering you.”

You merely sighed and, with your head still propped on your hand, you turned away from the red-headed male. “It’s just…were you serious when you said you wanted to date me?”

“Of course, love,” he said, continuing to eat his food.

“Then why does it seem that it is all a joke to you?”

He paused and placed his fork down. “Come again?”

You could feel the anger that you’ve kept bottled up these past few weeks start to bubble deep inside you. Despite the fact that he’s a vampire, you’re deeply and madly in love with him. However, you can’t stand the way he’s been treating you lately.

“Haven’t you been feeling lonely at all these past few weeks?”

“I have my work to keep me company, (F/N), you know this-”

You tuned out your boyfriend after hearing those words come out of his mouth. He prefers his work…over me?

“Of course I fucking know that, Bakashi!” you snapped, abruptly standing up, the legs of your chair scraping loudly across the floor. This action alone caused the male in front of you to flinch backwards in shock.

“(F/N), calm down -”

“I will not calm down Akashi!” with your head lowered, your hands were clenched into fists. You were trying so hard to hold in the tears, to prevent your voice from cracking. “I fucking hate you, Akashi Seijuro!” you yelled, turning on your heel as you ran out of the kitchen, the tears finally flowing freely. “I wish I’ve never fallen in love with you!”

Akashi just stared at the spot where you just were, his brain trying to comprehend what happened a few seconds ago.

“Why was (F/N)-chii crying, Akashi-chii?’ Kise asked entering the kitchen.

“Hell if I know, Ryouta.”

“It’s because you’ve been neglecting her, Akashi-kun.”

Startled by the mystery voice, Kise jumped and let out a scream while Akashi just flinched.

“Kuroko-chii! You almost gave me a heartattack,” Kise whined, looking at the shorter male behind him. “You have to stop doing that.”

“I’ve been here the whole time, its not my fault you didn’t notice me, Kise-kun,” he shrugged, before turning his gaze to the red-head in front of him.

“Neglecting her?”

“When was the last time you and F/N)-chii went on a date?”

“That was-”

“When was the last time you two spent quality alone time together?”

“We did-”

“When was the last time-”

“Will you two let me answer?!” he exclaimed, finally standing up and slamming his own hands down on the table.

Both Kuroko and Kise shut their lips, waiting for the redhead to answer.

W-when was the last time we went on a date? he asked himself, trying desperately to remember.

“You don’t remember, do you, Akashi-kun?”

Akashi looked up at his brothers. “I guess it has been a while-”

“We understand that you’re the head of the family and that dad is putting a lot of pressure on you, but even you have to remember that you need breaks. And besides, we can all see that you really love (F/N)-chan.”

“Even if you do act like a sadistic bastard around her.”

Turning around they saw Aomine leaning against the door frame.

“You shouldn’t have said that, Ao-”

In a flash, Aomine found himself pinned against the wall-Akashi’s heterochromatic eyes staring deep into his. “You dare say that again, Daiki?”

“You heard me Akashi,” was the reply he got.

“Injuring Aomine-kun won’t help your situation with (F/N)-chan, Akashi-kun,” Kuroko jumped in, stopping Akashi from most likely doing something stupid.

“Tch.” Akashi released his hold on Aomine’s shirt and backed away.

“Go find her, Akashi-chii, and set things right.”

“Shut up, Ryouta,” he growled and stormed out of the kitchen.

“Thanks for saving my ass, Tetsu-”

“Aomine-kun. If I wasn’t worried about having to clean up blood from the kitchen again, I would’ve let him kill you.”

“TETSU!”

~~~~~

“(F/N), let me i-”

“Fuck off Bakashi!”

Despite your protest, Akashi entered your room, which startled you.

“What the hell Akashi! What if I had been changing?” you exclaimed, as you sat up from your previous position, wiping away the tears that were on your eyes.

“Nothing I haven’t seen before,” he smirked.

“HENTAI!” you exclaimed, as you threw a pillow at him, which he only dodged. “What the fuck do you want?” You sat full up on your bed, with your legs crossed.

With a sigh, he too sat down next to you and looked you in the eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“…Eh?” You stared at him with a raised eyebrow. “Did the great Akashi actually apologize? That’s a first.”

“I’m serious.” His eyes narrowed and his voice held no sign of enjoyment. “You were right; I do neglect you and for that I’m sorry. I know I said things I shouldn’t have said, and I regret those words.” He moved one of his hands to hold one of your own, his other hand gently placed on your cheek. “(F/N), I really do love you. I get so caught up in my work that I forget that you have needs as well. Please, forgive me, pancake.”

You could feel your eyes shaking as his stared into yours. However, the moment he called you the nickname that you absolutely hate, you frowned. “Cut the bullshit Akashi. You’re not here to really apologize. You just want my bloo-”

In an instant, you found a silver knife in your hand, the tip of the knife placed right over Akashi’s heart; his hand placed over your clenched fist.

“You think I’m joking?” he asked, as he pressed the tip of the knife closer to his skin, actually drawing some blood. “You do realize that vampires show their love by killing each other right? Kill me.”

His voice held no tremor, his eyes held no fear. He was serious.

“I fucking love you, (F/N).” His voice cracked and you could see he was holding back tears. “I don’t ever want to lose you-especially to my idiotic brothers.”

Instantly, you yanked your hand out of his grip, the knife accidentally cutting his hand in the process. “I won’t kill you, Akashi.” You tossed the knife on the floor and cupped his cheek. “It’s true, I do get lonely, which is why I spend so much time with your brothers. They make me feel like I truly am loved-and that I’m not just here as your livestock. I understand your workload, but I hate being ignored. Instead of playing shoji, lets do stuff together like a couple would. I love you so much Akashi-I just worry about you.”

Akashi just smiled and brought you in for a kiss. It started sweet, but then intensified as he kissed you deeper. You suddenly found yourself flat on your back, Akashi hovering above you.

He brought his head lower and closer to yours; you braced yourself for another feverish kiss, only to yelp when he dug his fangs into your neck. “What the hell Akashi?!”

“You’re mine, (F/N),” he growled, staring into your eyes. “I will mark you up; scar your body to let my brothers know who you belong too.” He bit into your neck again, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

You, (L/N) (F/N), was deeply in love with a sadistic, pain in the ass vampire…

And you wouldn’t have it any other way.

ARgh! I’m horrible at sadistic stuff. I tried I”m sorry!!!!!! - =͟͟͞͞ =͟͟͞͞ ﾍ( ´Д`)ﾉ

Again, thank you for your patience with this-I’m forever grateful! :D

Fun fact: Ayato’s voice actor, Midorikawa Hikaru also voices Ootori Eiichi in Uta no Prince Sama and Seto freaking Kaiba in Yu-Gi-Oh!

[drewkatchen]

Chris on his back patio | June 2017 | Jersey City, NJ | Pentax 67

Because my interview with Chris Leo involved a nice bottle of wine on a pretty damn nice summer day, our discussion meandered and maybe went longer than we initially expected, a fact that led to a hasty conclusion and us speeding off on bikes -- him on his and me on his wife’s -- to his work at the last minute.

Also, Chris is as generous in conversation as he is in his lyrics, and he’s willing to let things drift to wherever they may go for as long as they go. 

What follows is the second portion of our talk, which is concerned mostly with his band The Van Pelt, a musical group that began performing initially in 1993 and disbanded in 1997 after releasing two full-length albums on an independent record label. Chris played guitar and sang, and Brian Maryansky, Neil O'Brien and Sean Greene performed with him. Also, this interview is very much in the spirit of the way interviews run long in fanzines, with very little editing and condensing so as to offer the reader an accurate, non-embellished portrait of either their favorite band or a band they wanted to know more about or a band they know absolutely nothing about. Those are the interviews I grew up reading, whether they were in Maximum Rocknroll, HeartattaCk or a million other zines. That transparency is also in the interest of letting the artist’s thoughts run in their full and proper context. So a majority of this discussion below is as we had it, with very light doctoring for cohesion. I hope you enjoy it.

The Van Pelt have had several reunions, which first began in 2009, and they will continue this month with a small string of live performances. Go see them.

You can read the first portion of our chat HERE.

Thanks for inviting me over again. How has your day been so far?

I’m a little overworked. There’s the coordinating with wineries, how to get my wine from Italy to here. Then there’s the distribution part. I only import from Italy. Then there’s all these companies that I distribute wine from, but I don’t import their wine. That’s during the day. And then I have to find new people to sell it to and then I have to get it to those people. So I’m also the delivery man.

When do you sleep?

I don’t sleep much because at night I go and I’m doing this wine bar in Downtown Jersey City. The problem with New Jersey is it’s not for outside thinkers. It’s a place to breed outside thinkers that then get the fuck out of here. It’s a great place to create expats.

Well, let’s flip the record a bit as it were, because this is also partially based on what you’re doing with music.

At this moment, Charlie the dog interrupts the proceedings for a few moments. But it’s cool because he’s stopped barking and now he’s being friendly.

Is he young, how old is he?

He’s actually almost seven. We’ve had him for three years. He was in the pound for three years and he was on the streets of Los Angeles for a year. That’s why he’s all tough guy.

Did you get him in Los Angeles?

Yeah, we got evicted because of him barking like crazy.

I believe it. So what year did The Van Pelt begin?

I think we began in the fall of 1993 or in the spring of 1994. It’s hard to say because there were many iterations of the band. I started out on bass.

Did you?

Yeah. And we made these two albums, and the second album -- which was our more popular album – we had issues with the mastering. So, not only did we want to get it back in print and we wanted it remastered for our own sake. And so we did.

Is it more fun for you talking about wine or the band?

There’s definitely more joy in wine. Music isn’t pure joy. Music is pain. But also amazing. I also like talking about music because it’s so hard for me to articulate.

You’ve remastered these records again because you want them to sound better. But you’re also doing what you don’t like to do, which is play shows. Why are you doing that?

Except that I feel like I’m in a cover band.

Oh, that makes sense. But does that fact make it any easier?

Yeah, because now I’m singing the songs of this pretty cool kid from twenty years ago. And I’m playing a part; I’m trying to get into his mindset. One common theme of the band is disillusionment with the left, this civil war amongst Democrats and progressives in America.

What left are you talking about?

I’m talking about an eighteen-year-old’s idea of the left. I’m talking about an eighteen-year-old who is coming from an all-boys Catholic high school who created his idea of the left and was dying to leave this and find my people in the Lower East Side. The huge mistake I made was that to me the left meant open dialogue and the right meant closed dialogue. Where I really wanted to go was where you could sit at a bar or table with anybody and you could throw out any topic. What I found was the left was not about open dialogue. It was ‘The right believes ABC; we believe XYZ.’ And I didn’t think that was the way it was going to be. I thought it was going to be ‘The right believes ABC, and we believe everything else.’

So, lyrically that is what the band represents to you now? When you look back on it that’s how you see what you were doing?

Partially. In the sense that it’s one of the themes I’m excited to revisit because I think it’s so relevant now with the Democratic Party not see what was really coming with the progressives and Bernie Sanders.

The other thing I like revisiting is Chris Leo apriori optimist versus Chris Leo the empirical optimist. These things have changed quite a bit, but I love playing the role of the apriori guy. For example, if I was kind of hip to Monsanto when I was nineteen or twenty, I would have thought it was way cooler than I think it is now. I would have thought this idea of fucking with nature down to the bare bones is the coolest idea ever. ‘That’s what we’re supposed to do. We’re part of nature. If we don’t admit we’re part of nature then we don’t really understand nature. We’re part of nature and us fucking with it is the coolest thing ever.’ That’s Chris Leo the apriori optimist in the nineties. Let’s take this to the extreme; let’s take on nature. Yes, so many times we’ve done this we’ve failed miserably but let’s keep doing it. Chris Leo the empirical optimist now, twenty years later…if Monsanto had this little lab in Nebraska where they did all the same things and they live streamed it to us and said ‘Hey, we’re going to make this crazy square tomato and we’re going to feed it to dogs for twenty years and see what happens and we’re going to do all these other experiments but inside this hyper-controlled environment. But that’s not what Monsanto does, so therefore now I will get on board with the left of the early nineties and the left now and march against Monsanto.

You did write a lot about food in your songs. Hang on, let’s see what did I write down in my notebook? Here are some examples: An unseasoned meal, before the meat turns toxic in our tubes, feed me bread, lychee pits, gathering bread for your plate, more apple pie than I’ve ever been.

I guess I’ve been heading down the food and beverage path forever. And with The Lapse I had ‘Buffet.’ [’Buffet’ is a song from the 2000 album ‘Heaven Ain’t Happen’ where Leo proclaims ‘We make meals out of condiments.’]

I’m assuming you like to eat even though you’re very thin. Damn you.

I do like to eat.

What else was on your mind then?

Sex. Love. Politics, yes. Mortality always.

Even at that age?

ALWAYS. I always think about it.

Do you see yourself as a musician, songwriter, arranger? What do you see yourself as?

I’m not a performer. I’m terrible. I’d like to believe I’m a musician, but again, I feel like there’s this reciprocity that comes with being a musician, and I can’t say that I’m a musician. I don’t feel confident saying I’m a musician, but I like playing music.

What is your relationship with music like now?

It’s starting to find a real nice sweet spot, 43 years deep into my life. When I was making music with The Van Pelt and even The Lapse, sometimes I was just a little too close to it to appreciate it in its fullness, particularly with The Lapse. I almost became less of a fan boy than I was before I started playing music. I was just too deep in it. Too heady with it. Then, after the Vague Angels [Leo’s band from the aughts], I stopped playing music entirely. So, I haven’t written anything new for eight years or so. And the first year was amazing. I became more of a listener in every sense of the word, and not just with music, but with wine too. It was so helpful. I had this burst of interest in music, just as a listener. I was a super fanboy.

Of what?

I was just sucking everything up. At the time, I was living in Italy, and I was trying really hard to find good Italian music. I was really digging deep into Italian music. But then my music muscle atrophied. Not playing music, I realized that all these other things I was investing my interest in co-opted my brain. It was this really weak music muscle. Then I would go years picking up one or two bands a year.

What were the genres that you began liking as you got older?

I’ve always loved pop and dance. In the eighties, they used to call me a poseur because when I would write band names on my shoes, I would have like R.E.M., Erasure and Cover Girls. Kids would be like ‘You can’t put Cover Girls next to R.E.M.’

Who were the Cover Girls?

You don’t remember them?

I know the Weather Girls and Mary Jane Girls.

[Chris sings to me] Show me, show me you really love me. Actions speak louder than words.

Is it freestyle?

Yes, I love freestyle. We should do a freestyle night. [Chris frequently has friends and patrons play music on the bar’s sound system]

Oh, you know more than I do about freestyle.

We can get people to help us out. So, this is also during the glory years of 120 Minutes, so I was just discovering late-era Wire, but listening to Silent Morning. It’s always been a thread in my life, dance music and freestyle and pop.

I would get that listening to The Van Pelt.

Ha. Ok, remove yourself from the situation a bit. You gotta know what you do, and that’s not always what you listen to. I just don’t do certain things. There’s plenty of music I just don’t do. With The Van Pelt, I was hyper-restrained and I loved it. When we broke up I didn’t want to do anything restrained. I wasn’t feeling restrained. Now I’m stoked to do a lot of that. I wanted to explode because I was just so sick of the punk environment being so sterile. Music is supposed to make you abandon all inhibitions; music is supposed to take you from, if you walked in sad and watched a happy band then you leave happy or if you walk in happy and watch a sad band, then you leave sad. You’re supposed to lose it, and punk was so not about losing it.

Can you contextualize for me what The Van Pelt were? What world did you fit into?

So, we had two albums. The first album was a real fanboy album.

What does that mean?

Like young kids who are sucking up as much music as possible.

What were you sucking up?

Everything from Seam to Gastr Del Sol to Kraftwerk to whatever cassette was really cheap on tour at a gas station in Kansas, which might have been Procol Harum, and who knew they had other songs? So, absolutely everything. But we were all in agreement that we wanted to make anthems, we really wanted to kick out the jams. And this is a contextual thing because nineties New York were not about bands. That was for the rest of America. You had Jon Spencer and Sonic Youth and you had bands like that but they were in a whole mega league; they were not DIY. We would have aspired to their sales and notoriety but we were DIY [do-it-yourself or independent] through and through, to a fault. 

That’s one of the reasons sometimes people would call us emo. Your choices were to go indie and work the 21-and-up circuit playing all these bars and you have a booking agent and everything is pretty legit. Or continue with DIY and do the 18-and-up circuit or play anyone’s basement anywhere and also play bars but book it yourself and hop in the van, make everything happen the way you want it to happen and just because you’re doing it that way, they want to call you emo because that was the predominant DIY genre at the time.

So you don’t feel like you fit into that or you were that?

I don’t feel like we fit into that at all. What, you do?

I don’t know, maybe a little bit.

Maybe a little bit, sure. But not exclusively. We just wanted to make music. The second album was after a bunch of lineup changes; we’d just finished college. There was a huge blizzard in New York. We’d all just broken up with our girlfriends, so that was really pure. That one was like ‘This is what’s happening. No one is going to like it, but this is what’s happening. And it’s a bummer and this music sucks.’ Of course, that’s the record people like. So, who were we? We were just kids figuring out who we were.

Were you punk? Did you think of yourselves as punk then or no?

No. We thought of ourselves as DIY.

What’s the difference?

Punk has constraints.

So does DIY by its definition, no?

There’s no aesthetic or sonic restraints.

Oh, I see, I see. Where were you playing and who were you playing with? Who were your peers at the time?

We were playing at Brownies on Avenue A and 11th Street all the time.

RIP. [Brownies, an East Village rock/punk/indie club, closed in 2002].

I know, RIP. We never played Brooklyn. There was nothing there. Where else were we playing?

Did you ever play in New Jersey?

We played a Knights of Columbus in Wallington on the Passaic River, which was great. We would play colleges. We played The Cooler, all the time.

Who were you playing with? You were playing with emo bands, I’m guessing, even though you were not.

If we weren’t the booking agent. If it was a bill we booked, we would play with one of my brothers’ bands, Chisel or Radio Saturn. We’d play with Garden Variety. We played with Dahlia Seed. Their new band is playing with us in D.C.

Promise Ring? Texas is the Reason?

We didn’t play with Texas too much. We were all friends, but we didn’t cross with them much musically.

This isn’t the first time The Van Pelt has reunited. How do you feel about it now?

Great. This is basically the third time.

What made you reunite the first time in 2009?

Because an old friend of ours from Austin was like ‘Hey, I’m putting together a nineties bill for SXSW this year, please play.’

The Van Pelt perform in June 2009 at Coco 66 in Greenpoint, Brooklyn.

Had you entertained the idea before that?

It never really crossed my mind, honestly. No one even asked us, really. So, we all agreed to do it, and it was really cool. But it was a year after I stopped playing music.

Didn’t you write a novel in there somewhere, too?

I wrote five.

Didn’t you write five novels in there somewhere, too?

So, we did it. My relationship with music in general was weird. It was more about meeting these guys that I shared so much with back in the day. But when bands break up, it’s like breaking up with a girlfriend; it’s never perfect.

So you had no real misgivings about reforming?

I did. But for me on that tour, I had misgivings about playing music and playing Van Pelt music, but I wanted to play with those guys. I wanted to get back on track and bury every and any hatchet that could possibly be still hanging out there for no good reason. And we succeeded in that. Sonically the theme wasn’t clear to me in my head.

Does it fit sonically with who you are now or what you’re interested in?

That’s one of the things I love in revisiting these songs; some of it really does.

Would you listen to that now as a man your age?

The second album yes. The first album not so much, but I have fun playing those songs. And some of them we’ve kind of done adult contemporary style and we’ll be doing some of them that way for these shows. The point is, that was really cool in 2009, but it didn’t bring everything together in my mind that I was hoping it would. So then, we release what was supposed to be our third album, and in doing so we get offered to play this huge festival in England. It was one of the ATP festivals [Jabberwocky, 2014]. By that point everything is cool between The Van Pelt guys, thematically everything is settled in my head. We go and play these shows, and it was fucking amazing. We were really good.

The beauty of your vocal style is that your speaking voice doesn’t change that much.

It’s a little deeper now.

With the exception of maybe ‘We Are the Heathens’, you can kinda do most of it, right?

I can do most of it better.

I assume your upper register is gone though.

Yeah, it’s gone. I think sometimes it sounds better now though. So musically those shows were great and it was super fun. So then, the record label that releases that was like ‘Ok cool, that was a success. Let’s re-master and release your first two records. But you gotta play more shows.’ And we said, ‘Ok, cool.’ So, in the sense of like, do I need to keep revisiting old Van Pelt songs? No, I don’t. But, when we were rehearsing in 2012 and playing old songs, it was really hard to not write new songs.

So you’ve written new songs.

Yes, and we’re going to play some of those.

What do they sound like?

I dunno. We’ve only written three so far. We all have these little pieces we’re tinkering with.

So you have songs that are now five years old?

No, basically in 2012, in between playing old songs we would tinker with stuff and a song would come together and then we’d say ‘Oh fuck, we can’t do this right now. We gotta get back on track with relearning these old songs but my god it would be so much fun to flesh this out.’ So then, that’s the way we rationalize these new shows. So, now let’s spend some time fleshing these things out.

What percentage of the set will be new material?

Maybe we’ll throw in one or two for the shows. And hopefully we’ll have a new album in 2018.

You’re kind of like Linklater’s ‘Before’ trilogy. Every decade you do something.

Maybe. I love playing with those guys.

Do you find it bizarre the music you were doing then can live beyond its initial time?

No, because back in that time I was digging deep into the racks looking for stuff from twenty years earlier, and it fit the context of that time.

What were the primary sources? Sonic Youth, Velvets, Galaxie 500?

I didn’t listen to Sonic Youth much, only because that was such the sound of the time you almost didn’t need to listen to it. I didn’t listen to it a lot, but yes, I love Sonic Youth.

With the first record, we really wanted to make anthems because we were living in this time where the guitar players were no longer making anthems. And there weren’t many guitar players. They were all going the route of the deejay. So, it was like all the guitar players are getting weird as fuck, and we liked it. But we wanted to give a go at making an album of anthems.

I was listening to a lot of the Dustdevils. An interesting thing, we discovered a lot of bands by who people said they imagined we were listening to. People would say we must have listened to a lot of Bedhead, and we said no. And then we’d go listen to Bedhead. And even The Fall. I didn’t listen to The Fall until everyone said we sounded like The Fall. Which could bring us to Parquet Courts.

How do they relate to you?

You don’t think they sound like us?

Ooh, yes. I do.

So many people are like ‘Are you going to sue them or what?’

They seem very knowledgeable in what they’re doing. I think they’re very steeped in music history. [Full disclosure: I once saw Andrew Savage at a DS-13 show in Brooklyn wearing a Turning Point shirt. The Hi-Impact Turning Point shirt. That is fairly legit to me. I also like them a lot, probably because they remind me of The Van Pelt.]

Maybe that’s the case, and if it is, then they should give us a shout out. If it’s not the case, the world is so weird that I can believe it not being the case. Anyhow, I love it. I do love them.

You kind of got me inebriated. Who else were your influences?

Eric B. & Rakim were a huge influence, to the idea of speaking and saying intelligent things and putting it to a repeating riff.

Can you estimate how many shows you played when you were around?

It had to be over a hundred. We were just talking about this.

Did you enjoy being in a band?

Everything about it except the actual show. That part I wasn’t so into. Traveling, late-night drives, post-sound check hanging out at the bar during happy hour when no one’s there. A sticky, stinky bar. I loved that stuff. Meeting people from all around the world. I loved being in a band and touring.

When it comes to the music and the recording, was the intention to have the music serve your voice? To me, the music is behind you on the recordings.

I rarely write the lyrics with the music; I can’t do that. I’ll have a bank of lyrics. Even right now I have tons. That’s constant. When we start to tinker with a song, I’ll think about what lyrics will fit with the mood of the song.

Do you care what people take from your lyrics? Do people ask you what your lyrics mean?

I do get asked from time to time. I hope people take something from them. When people usually ask me, I like to say in the least snarky way possible, if I could articulate them in another way, then I wouldn’t have made lyrics out of them. This is the art form. It’s not a redundant art form. The reason poetry and lyrics exist is because it fills an articulation gap.

Did you put a lot of emphasis on them at the time or are they quick musings?

No, I sweat them out. To write lyrics for The Van Pelt, I would get on my bike, and I would have pen and paper, and I would loop Manhattan. I would go from Wall Street all the way up to Hell Gate Bridge [near Astoria, Queens]. And anytime something would come together, I would stop and write it down.

Do you recall ever having people really wanting to know exactly what you meant? Punk commonly demands black and white lyrical subject matter. How did you deal with it?

Yes. I probably dealt with it poorly, but I don’t remember. It can’t fit into a perfect dialogue; if it could, it wouldn’t be music or lyrics. It’s not regular dialogue, it’s an art. For example, when I go to a museum, I want to take the lengthy explanations off the wall and throw it in the trash. I hate the idea of a little placard telling me what a painting is supposed to resemble. I want to look at the painting and enjoy it, period.

Sultans of Sentiment…this is a Dire Straits thing?

No, it came from Twin Peaks. By the way, one of the things you asked before, I don’t think I answered it fully. What do I want from these shows? I really hope we can reach a few kids. That would make me so happy. Like if the version of us that was flipping through records at Kim’s in the early nineties, just finding obscure shit from 20 years earlier, if that kid finds us and we’re part of some thread.

Is The Van Pelt considered obscure now?

I think we’re super obscure, no? We don’t make any lists of bands of the early nineties.

Hmm. Did I not ask you anything? Oh, I know, are your lyrics about any real-lived events?

Yes. ‘Do the Lovers Still Meet at the Chiang Kai-Shek Memorial?’ I was dating a girl who was half-Irish and half-Chinese and her Irish dad died, and her Chinese mother remarried a Chinese guy and they lived in Taiwan. And so I went to Taiwan a couple times during college, and I was not ready for the culture shock at all. It was really a lot for a kid in his twenties to take. Sometimes I would just need a break from the family and all the cultural things I just couldn’t accept, so we would meet at the Chiang Kai-Shek Memorial. It’s a huge giant white-and-blue pagoda, and old people would do ballroom dancing outside of it. And we would meet there, and we’d go out to clubs there and escape the madness of the culture clash that eventually proved to be too much for us. Eventually I left Taiwan with her prematurely on one visit, and I had a big argument with her family. I said ‘I’m done with this; I’m taking her out of the country. I’m done with this.’ It was just a huge battle. Pretty intense times.

Well, I’m glad I asked that. Ok, we’ve talked forever. Let’s end it. Thanks Chris.